I have come up with my first annual list of things we can do without.  I suppose that some people will disagree with the things that I’ve listed, but who cares?  This is my list and my opinions.

I really have a big problem with those sappy radio shows where people call, tell sappy loves stories and then make sappy dedications.  We also don’t need radio stations that have “Elvis” or “Beatles” weekends.  Don’t get me wrong I like Elvis, and the guys from England are great, but not for an entire weekend!  

        I also don’t appreciate stores putting up Christmas stuff and playing Christmas music before while it’s still 80 degrees outside.  I also have difficulty with stores substituting “Happy Holidays” for “Merry Christmas,” and forgetting that Easter is about Easter.  If you don’t want to celebrate these holidays then cover your ears or find somewhere else to shop. 

        And, I think that stores opening 24 hours is a little ridiculous.  Think about how much air conditioning, heating, lighting and electricity these stores use at night.  There is no reason that stores can’t close at a practical hour, open at a reasonable time and stay closed during church hours and on holidays.  I know for a fact that Tami, Nicole, and Pamela will continue to shop…when the store is open.

            I also have a big problem with these SUPER stores.  They are way to big and downright obnoxious.  If I want to buy an oil filter for my car I will go to an auto parts store.  If I want to buy some new underwear then I’ll go to a store that sells underwear.  If I want to buy a six-pack of beer and some pickled pigs feet, then I’ll go to the grocery store.  For everything else, I’ll send my wife.

            I believe cell phones have become a necessary evil of today’s society, but the problem isn’t with the cell phones, it’s with the stupid people that don’t know how to use them.  The next time I hear a cell phone ring while I’m in a men’s bathroom, I’m going to “let out” with some loud obnoxious noises that your girlfriend won’t appreciate and will make your friends envious!

        We could also do with a few less coffeehouses.  A cup of coffee isn’t meant to cost 4 dollars and most Americans don’t want coffee made with monkey poo laced with a hint of guava.  Coffeehouses attract groups of liberals and that isn’t a good thing!  Groups of liberals come up with ideas and 99 percent of the time they are going to cost taxpayers more money.  Coffeehouses should be kept for the working taxpaying men and women that want a good cup of joe.

        We could also do with a few less professional lifetime politicians.  Now, I realize that politicians are necessary to keep our government running.  But honestly, wouldn’t we be better off by choosing representatives by drawing straws or playing ini-mini-miny-moe?

I also believe lotteries are something we could do without.  Let’s look at this with some reality; lotteries are a tax on people that can’t pass a fifth grade math test.  Instead of playing the lottery I’ve always thought I would have better luck finding the prettiest girl in town, giving her the money, closing my eyes and puckering up!

        In the world of sports, I believe that we can get rid of the NBA and soccer.  I detest hearing squeaking tennis shoes on basketball courts and I believe soccer is the feminine version of people that can’t play football.  If soccer wants to survive, maybe they could combine soccer with hockey, they could call it “So-Ho.”   Send all complaints about the preceding comment to Jessie and Al.

              Television is another thing we could with a little less of.  The best thing on television is the TV Land channel which airs television shows that we thought were brainless in the 60’s.  And, newscasts are nothing more than entertainment because they have become so profit-driven that journalism takes back seat to sensationalism.   If you don’t believe me, show me ONE ugly newscaster!